An Open Letter to the Church I Grew Up In-
With all due respect, humility and hope for healing...
Undeniably, not just for decades, but rather for centuries, and not only in America, but also worldwide, the Catholic Church has hidden the sin and the shame of sexual abuse/pedophilia by a significant number of its priests. The pain and suffering caused to vulnerable children is hellish and inexcusable. The legal and financial repercussions have been and will continue to be staggering, but ever more so will be the moral/morale consequences dependent upon the official Church leadership’s response. Perhaps as the truth is exposed there can be a kind of redemption, if the leaders of the Church accept responsibility and commit to prevention of further abuse. The sad “his”tory of the Church reflects that of “man”kind- men in pain maladaptively inflicting pain on women and children. This will not change significantly until the Church (and society in general) addresses this fact and dedicates itself to truly “humane” values and living for all men, women and children. I believe that there are essential flaws in the customary “recruitment“ to and function of the priesthood. Fundamental changes in the nature of the priesthood must take place to make this a vocation that allows a life of human fulfillment and service. Many" traditionalists” may react negatively, but the very life of the Church and its clergy depends upon a revolution in thinking and practice. The Catholic Church needs to join most other major religions and allow both men and woman to be ordained," allow” priests whether male or female, heterosexual or homosexual to marry and parent as they freely choose. Celibacy likewise must be a choice,not a “commandment”. Before any person is considered for training for the priesthood, the individual must be screened thoroughly as is routinely done with professionals in other “vocations” to disqualify potential likely abusers of any type. Clearly the training of all priests must focus on education to prevent the abuse that is coming to light so alarmingly now. Historically priests who abused children were transferred to other assignments with no official intervention, treatment or reparation and the abuse continued. From now onward all allegations must be investigated by the Church and simultaneously by the police and courts; the protections and due process for all “accused” and “accusers/victims ” must be respected under canon and civil law. Where there is innocence there will be vindication and where there has been abuse appropriate punishment and “restitution”. The magnitude of the crime and the pain of the victims demands this and nothing less!
In the specific case of the Boston’s Cardinal Law, he must more than publicly admit sorrow and regret...his knowledge of abuse cases, reassignment of offending priests and the consequent continued child victimization makes him an accomplice in these crimes, for he had the knowledge and power to stop them and he did not. This is not to undo the goodness he has done in many other areas or to destroy the man, but as an example of true contrition and repentance, a beginning of truth and healing and future trust, he must step down! (He could assume an appropriate role perhaps in conjunction with his successor to organize a clergy-laity task force to begin the preventative and therapeutic work that needs to be done desperately and immediately.)
For the autobiographical record I am very happily married, a father, a former public school teacher and a practicing Registered Nurse. I was baptized and raised in the Catholic Church, was an “altar boy” for many years, attended parochial schools from the 2nd-12th grades and was extremely devout, even considering the priesthood until the age of 16...I was inspired (and sometimes confused or baffled) by priests and nuns who varied from excellent to eccentric in their intellectual and emotional search for God and service to man and woman. I was never abused by any person of the clergy- perhaps I could have benefited from a gentle “reality check “ to bring my heartfelt mysticism back down to earth. I am no longer a “practicing Catholic”- I think I have my spirituality and “humanism” about right in my life. I do share in the Church baptisms, weddings and funerals of family and friends with the utmost respect for their faith, for the dedication of the majority of the clergy, and for the tremendous power “religion” of every denomination has in the lives of the sick I serve as a Nurse. If the aforementioned changes to end child/sexual abuse in the Church were to take place would I return? No- that was and ever will be the faith of my childhood, so always a part of me, and I have made my personal peace with whatever Good/God there may be.
The Catholic Church can continue to be a tremendous source of inspiration and a powerful force for good for its members - and for all the people of this needy, hurting world. If only it will answer this current crisis and other fundamental human concerns (sexuality, reproduction, divorce, ecumenism, poverty, racism, violence ...) with truth and compassion. The alternative is a more sorrowful future of dwindling, disheartened priests and parishioners, of religious faith and human spirit broken.
Let us pray (and work) that it is not so.
Sincerely,
Mike Cotter,RN
5 Post Island Road
Quincy,Ma. 02169
617-471-4663
February 26,2002
cc: His Holiness, Pope John Paul II
Cardinal Bernard Law
The Boston Globe
The Quincy Patriot Ledger
The Pilot
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